.I Saw You: Escape Plan

A guy ran into a girl at the bar I frequent. He was pleasantly surprised to see her and she was absolutely ecstatic to see him but not for the reasons you might think. Some drunk was harassing her in stereotypical fashion. “You’re pretty. Let me buy you a drink!” He may not have had on beer goggles, but he definitely had beering aids because he didn’t seem to hear her say, “I’m not interested.” “Hey, babe!” she yelled to her old friend from across the bar, as she darted toward him. He looked bewildered. Once in arm’s length, I saw her mouth, “Pretend like you’re my boyfriend.” The problem was, he came with girl, and it looked like they had just started dating. She went to the bathroom just moments before to reapply her makeup. Now, what was he to do? Spurn the drunk away by displaying a little PDA and portray what a loving pretend boyfriend he is? Or be a bad friend, and disengage from the charade so that when his date came back from fixing her eyeliner, he didn’t ruin his chances of being a real boyfriend?

I Saw You is an anonymous “man on the street” column. Email your rants and raves about co-workers or any badly behaving citizens to iS*****@*******ws.com, or send to 380 S. First St, San Jose, 95113. Submissions should stick to about 100 words.

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